Overcoming the damage of bullying, part 1
Written by Vega Sims Posted in Beat bullying
Bullying can cause a lot of pain and destroy your confidence, but you don’t have to be a victim for the rest of your life. People who bully others often use this behaviour as a way to make themselves feel better and more powerful. Usually bullies are acting out because they feel they are lacking in some way or another.
Just because someone at school said something about you does not make it true and you should never believe what a bully said because it’s all lies made up to make the bully feel more important than you – I can tell you for sure, they are not more important or better that you. Realising this is much harder than it sounds, because it feels like the end of the world when you have had to spend break times hiding in the bathroom or running home after school just to avoid being a target.
You have two choices;
- Start the path to healing and living a wonderful life
- Remain a victim and limit your chances of being happy
If you are ready to leave these experiences behind and start the healing process you will have to let go of the anger, pain and resentment you feel inside.
Talking from experience, those people who call others names, hurt them and make them feel like they’re insignificant often have very unhappy adult lives, simply because they remain very unhappy inside.
Saying all these things are good and well, but how do you move on from the bad experiences in your past?
The first thing I want you to say to yourself over and over again is, “It’s not my fault”. The second thing I’d like you to say to yourself is, “I am good enough”. I’d like you to say this many times each day until you believe it.
I’m going to leave you with this exercise, practice it as often as you can, every morning you wake up and throughout the day. You might feel stupid doing it in the beginning, but it’s very important that you believe these words! Every person, including you, has something special to offer the world. The sooner you realise that the sooner you’ll start to feel more confident and happy.
About the Author
Vega is TCHC and this programme's Marketing Manager. She looks after the website, creates all the graphics and writes for the advice blog.
She's got a Marketing and Communications post graduate degree from the University of Pretoria with extensive amount of marketing experience, she owned a business and sings in a rock band.
Favourite quote: "...even if we don't have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from here." ― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower